Partylife
by ReginaMills96
Summary: SEQUEL TO DEMONS IN THE NIGHT. This is what happens between Ivy and Sam, 3 months after Ivy moved in. Ivy is almost back to her normal self but what will happen when she mixes her 'happy pills' and alcohol. Will her memory of the events that happened the night before ever return to her?
1. Chapter 1

_3 Months later_

(Ivy's POV)  
I lay in bed staring at the ceiling, I was alone in the house. Sam was at work and it was teacher training today. I had an appointment with Lara this afternoon so I had the whole morning to myself. Lara said I was making good progress but I still saw her twice a week for now just because she didn't want anything to set me back. The pills helped too, I called them my happy pills because it helped me to make a joke out of a serious situation. My phone beeped and I rolled over stretching out to get it off my bedside table.

'Parti tonite at B's. U comin? M xxx'

I typed out a reply and sent it.

'Y tonite? Its a skool nite? I xxx'

'Come on dont b such an ol' lady. It'll b fun. M xxx'

I sighed I wasn't really in the partying mood but I didn't want them all to wind me up about it.

'Fine. Wat time? I xxx'

'Starts at 7 xxx'

I pulled myself out of bed and went downstairs putting the kettle on. I had loads to sort out. I got my pills off the side, Sam always left them there so I wouldn't forget to take them. I took two with my coffee and my eyes rested on one line at the bottom of the box. On that one line.

DO NOT CONSUME WITH ALCOHOL

What was I going to do now?

(Sam's POV)  
Work had been quiet so Tom and I had been catching up on some paperwork. Although in the ED paperwork was never up to date. I didn't finish until 8 tonight and I just hoped Ivy was okay. I felt like I left her alone too often but she seemed to think it was okay and I'd heard nothing from Lara that said otherwise. I didn't reach home until 8:30 and there I found a note from Ivy on the side.

'Sleeping over at Michaela's. Forgot we had a chemistry project we haven't done, it's due in tomorrow so going to pull an all nighter. See you tomorrow. Love you. I xxx'

It wasn't the first time I'd gotten home to find a note from Ivy, but I guess I shouldn't complain really it meant she was taking the time out for her studies and I was proud of her.

(Ivy's POV)  
When I arrived at Michaela's she was already ready, Paul was there too. In fact it was Paul who answered the door. Me and him were friends again but he wanted more and I wasn't sure if that was what I wanted. I was wearing a red dress that flared out at the waist and red heels. It was Paul's favourite and I hadn't meant to tease him but all my other stuff was dirty.  
We all got in Michaela's brother's car and headed to Bolton's house, we had to pick up Sam, Lauren and Josh on the way so I ended up sitting on Paul's knee which kinda made me a little uncomfortable. I was glad to get there and get the drink flowing, I knew I wasn't supposed to but it was a party. What harm could it do?

How wrong could I have been? I woke up naked next to Paul. With no memory of what had happened the night before. I guess that was the harm mixing pills and alcohol could do. Paul was passed out completely. My phone beeped with a facebook notification, it was a link. To a youtube video. I clicked it and watched. It was me getting wasted and dancing on the table with Paul...In his pants...Oh my god. I was dead. So dead. 


	2. Chapter 2

(Rachel's POV)

I was clearing away from assembly, tuesdays were always year 10 assembly and then Ivy stayed behind and we had a mentoring session straight after. Only this morning she hadn't turned up. Ivy had come a long way these past few months, Her attendance was up as were her grades. Sam was giving her a good home and routine and it was doing Ivy the world of good. I finished clearing away and went up to my office. I guess Ivy was a no show this morning.

(Ivy's POV)

Paul walked me to school, I was late, hungover and him being clingy wasn't helping at all. I wasn't in the mood for mentoring, Miss Mason just wanted answers. Why was I late? Etc. Etc. I went up to the library and pulled out an exersize book, I hadn't lied about the chemistry project and I actually hadn't done it but it wasn't group work. I had about 20 minutes to get a project done that i'd had for 3 weeks.

When the bell rung for second period I hadn't done much. I took my usual seat at the back of the room next to Micheala. As soon as everyone was in the room, Mr Mead started the class.

"So what's going on with you and Paul?" Micheala whispered

"Nothing"

"Nothing? You were all over him last night?"

"I was drunk"

"Did you sleep with him" she asked

"I don't know I was drunk"

"Ivy, Micheala? Something you'd like to share?" Mr Mead asked

"No sir" I replied and he carried on

"Were you careful?" Micheala whispered

"I don't know I was drunk"

"You know he won't just let it go?"

"Yeah I know he's been clinging to me all morning"

"Ivy switch places with Siobhan" Mr Mead said

That meant I'd be sat in between Lindsay and Amy. I sighed.

"Why?" I argued

"Because I asked you to. Now move"

I moved reluctantly. Amy kept nudging me making me smudge my notes.

"Stop it bitch before I smudge your face!" I told her

"Ivy wait outside" Mr Mead said

"Why!? She's the one annoying me!" I exclaimed

"Right Ivy take a textbook and go and work in the cooler. I'll come and talk to you in a bit" Mr Mead said

I bent down grabbing my bag and as I was on my way out Amy tripped me up. I stood up and hit her in the nose. It was bleeding heavily. Mr Mead took me outside and handed me a textbook.

"Cooler now!"

(Rachel's POV)

I had an unexpected visit from Chris at break. I had just made myself a coffee and I sat down to drink it.

"Hi Chris what's up?" I asked

"I really wish I didn't have to tell you this. She's been doing so well. Ivy..."

"What's she done?" I asked

"She was talking to Micheala so I moved her, she argued with me about that. Then she had an arguement with Amy Porter. Amy tripped her up and she punched her in the nose. I'm pretty sure it's broken" Chris explained

"I had a feeling something would happen today. She was late this morning, didn't turn up to her mentoring appointment...Okay where is she?" I asked

"Cooler"

"Alright thank you Chris"

(Ivy's POV)

Mr Budgen was on cooler duty and he'd fallen asleep. I saw this as a chance to escape if I stayed Mr Mead would start asking about my chemistry assignment and I hadn't done it. I kept my eyes behind me, I bumped straight into Miss Mason.

"Ivy..." She put her hand on my shoulder "Let's have a chat shall we?"

"I'd rather not, I have work to do" I turned back around and sat in my seat in the cooler.

Miss Mason left and I thought that was the end of it but she returned 5 minutes later with her coffee. That meant this was going to be a long talk. Mr Budgen was relieved which he was happy about. She sat next to me.

"So what's going on?" she asked

"Nothing"

"Come on. Kicking off in class? Fighting? Turning up late? That's not you. Not anymore"

"You don't know me...Not really"

"Come on Ivy. It's just you and me. You don't have to plaster on the hard act. What happened last night?"

I shrugged. "I stayed over at Micheala's worked on my chemistry project"

"Really? Because Mr Mead says you didn't hand it in..."

I didn't reply.

"Did you have a fight with Sam? Or Lara? Or Paul?"

"You don't know anything. Just leave me alone"

"Let me ask you something?" She asked me

I groaned "What?"

"Have you taken your medication?" she asked calmly

She caught me off guard and I hesitated. "Course I have. Can I go?"

"Yep. Get to class, and behave yourself" she said

"Yep, whatever"


	3. Chapter 3

(Paul's POV)

Ivy had been acting really wild last night and that hadn't changed much this morning. I was sat in 3rd period english with Miss Shackleton, when my phone vibrated against my leg. I took it out looking at it under the table.

_**'Need 2 C U. Meet me in the girls T's in 5. Got sumthin 4 U. Luv I xxxxxxxxxxx'**_

Okay that was a bit weird. I shoved my phone back in my pocket and put my hand up.

"Yes Paul?" Miss Shackleton asked

"Can I go to the toilet?"

"Hurry up" she sighed

I rushed to the girls toilets where there was a sign on the door.

**OUT OF ORDER**

I opened the door a bit and looked around before going inside.

"Psst! Ivy?" I whispered

She came out of one of the cubicles and held something up. Her knickers. I could barely keep my mouth closed. She grabbed my tie with the other hand pulling me into a cubicle and locking it.

(Ivy's POV)

I kissed Paul hard, not being on the antidepresants made me wild. I liked it, I felt free. I undid his trousers and pulled down his boxers. He picked me up and pushed me against the door. He thrust himself inside me and I gasped as he kissed down my neck...

(Rachel's POV)

I sat in my office arguing with myself. I was sure that Ivy had just lied to me. She hadn't acted this way in ages...The medication seemed to sort her head out...Tame her. I opened my office door.

"Janeece could you get me a contact number for Ivy Nicholls' guardian please?"

Janeece nodded "Yes Miss Mason"

When I had the number I called Sam when I got the voicemail I assumed she was at work and contacted the second emergency contact. Lara. Dr Stone had worked in a very close liason with the school with Ivy's situation and I knew Ivy trusted her a lot.

The ringing tone sounded and after a few seconds someone answered.

"Hi Dr Stone speaking..." An australian voice greeted

"Hi Lara, it's Rachel Mason from waterloo road" I greeted back

"Rachel. Hi."

"I'm calling regarding Ivy. I haven't been able to get hold of Sam"

"Okay. What's the problem?" Lara asked

"I think Ivy may have stopped taking the medication. She was late this morning and she smelled of alcohol and all i've had from her today is trouble" I explained

"What she's consumed alcohol with the medication?"

"Possibly. She won't tell me anything, i'm just worried about her"

"Okay. Would it help if I came in this afternoon and had a chat with her?" she asked

"It's worth a try. I know the two of you have a close bond and I thought you might be able to get something out of her"

"Okay um, I can do 1:30? Is that any good?" she asked

"Perfect she'll be in form so I can get her easily"

"Okay 1:30 it is then"

"Thank you. Bu-bye"

"Bye"

(Ivy's POV)

I straightened my tie in the mirror and ran my fngers through my hair at an attempt to conceal the chaos. Paul came up behind me.

"What was that for?" he asked

"Dunno" I shrugged "Felt like it"

"What does this mean for 'us'?"

"Us? There is no us. It was just a bit of fun. A friends with benefits thing" I smiled

Paul left the toilets and I went to find an off license.

(Paul's POV)

Yes I wanted Ivy back but not like this. I didn't like this version of her. Not at all. I caught glimpse of her out of the window she was heding up the drive probably in search of more booze or something else. I ran to Miss Mason's office.

"I need to see Miss Mason!" I told the secretary

"I'm sorry she's in a meeting"

"I need to see her now!"

"Tough!"

I ran past her and barged in. Miss Campbell, Miss Mason, Mr Mead turned to look at me.

"Paul Langley what are you doing?" Mr Mead asked

"I'm sorry I need to speak to Miss Mason. It's important"

"Okay? What is it?" Miss Mason asked

"It's Ivy she's acting really weird and then she left school i'm worried she's going to get herself into trouble"


	4. Chapter 4

(Rachel's POV)

After driving round the main streets I parked up and decided to continue looking on foot. There was still the park and some local shops that I hadn't checked. I was near the shops when I noticed a group of boys and one girl in the middle. As I walked closer I recognised her.

"Ivy!" I called

She came over a glass bottle in her hand.

"What are you doing? Get in the car. Come on"

I took the bottle from her.

Once back at school I put Ivy in my office and she soon fell asleep. Having her there was the only way I could keep an eye on her. I wanted to know what had happened last night or today. The lat three months had been hard but we'd gotten there and now she was back at square one.

I went outside. "Janeece I need Paul Langley, Micheala White and Bolton Smilie up here now"

Lara came up the stairs, just in time. I took her into my office.

(Lara's POV)

Ivy was asleep, I shook her gently trying to wake her but not startle her.

"Ivy?" I said

She woke up and got straight to her feet. I stood in front of her, her eyes were wide, unfocused. She was jittery.

"What are you doing here? What do you want from me?" She asked frantically

"Ivy? Ivy it's okay. I'm here to help you remember?" I tried to reassure her

"I need you to be honest with me. Have you been taking the medication?"

She didn't answer me.

"Ivy?" I shook her gently

"I don't need it anymore! It makes me boring. Without it I feel free!" She said

"Okay. We're going to see Sam and talk about all this."

I turned round to face Rachel.

_**Call an ambulance**_

I mouthed before turning back to Ivy. I just needed to get her back on the medication but she'd never agree to it.

(Ivy's POV)

I saw an ambulance through the window. I turned to Lara and Rachel.

"Who's that for?" I asked calmly

"Ivy..." Lara said

"I said WHO THE FUCK IS THAT FOR!?" I screamed

"It's for us" Lara said

"Why? I'm not ill...I'm not hurt"

She gave me a look and I laughed.

"You think i'm crazy?"

"No. Listen..."

2 paramedics stood in the doorway. One man and one female.

"Ivy you're going to be okay-"

"I know! Because i'm fine. There's nothing wrong with me!"

"Ivy, look we'll go see Sam, get your medication sorted and then get you home"

"Listen, I live with Sam. Okay? I don't need some fucking NHS taxi service to take me!" I yelled

"Ivy you've been seeing me for 3 and a half months. You can trust me?"

"I'm not going into some nuthouse okay? I'm not crazy" I said at normal volume

"You won't we just want to help"

I really really wanted to trust her, I really did. I looked at Miss Mason who gave me a reassurig smile. I headed towards the paramedics with Lara behind me.

(Sam's POV)

Ivy came in with Lara, Dixie and Jeff. I had her put in a side room, I didn't want her to go walkabout. We gave her her medication via IV so that she couldn't tongue them or anything else. She seemed to calm down once they kicked in.

"Iv? What's going on sweetheart?" I asked

"I didn't mean for any of this. Bolton had a party last night and Micheala kept teasing me about being an old lady so I went and I got drunk. I don't remember anything" I sobbed "I just felt so free"

I wrapped my arms aroundd her holding her tight.

"Why didn't you just talk to me?"

"I was scared you'd be mad"

"Of course not"

"Please don't put me in one of those hospitals?" she pleaded

"You'll probably have to stay in overnight maybe some of tomorrow while we get your routine back on track but then you'll come home okay?" I told her

She sniffed "Okay"


	5. Chapter 5

(Ivy's POV)

I hated spending time in hospital, the smell of the cleaning products; the bed that wasn't my own…There was a time when I'd have said the doctors too. They always seemed patronizing to me but since I'd met Sam and Lara and Zoe I'd changed my opinion. I hoped I'd have Sam for the rest of my life but Lara…I knew a day would come when I'd have to say goodbye to her and that scared me.

I just wished there was someway that I could stay in contact with her but I was pretty sure that there was some rule against it. I had no trouble getting to sleep that night, I'd had a tiring day and I hadn't slept much the night before. I woke up about 3:45am with a really bad headache. It was crippling and any sign of light made it worse.

I turned around and put a pillow over my head trying to make it dark and eventually it got a little better allowing me to get back to sleep. I woke up sometime around 8. I found a pile of magazines and a note next to my bed.

_**Sorry I had to go to work sweetheart, Lara is going to come and take you home but I'm going to take some time off so have a look and let me know which one you like? I love you. Sam. Xxxxxx**_

I had a look through the magazines. They were holiday brochures. Melbourne. Los Angeles. New York. Rome. Dublin. Holiday? I'd never been abroad in my life. I decided to take them home and have a look later; right now I needed some fresh air. I climbed out of bed and peeked out into the corridor to make sure the coast was clear and then I made my way out and sat on a bench. It was cold and starting to rain but I was glad to be outside.

I closed my eyes leaning back against the cold stone after a few minutes my eyes reopened and I watched as the ambulances brought in more patients. Some just drunk and messed up others hurt.

(Lara's POV)

I had a quick word with Sam before heading up to the ward to sit with Ivy for a bit before she got discharged. Only I got up there to find her room empty. I found a nurse.

"Excuse me I'm looking for Ivy Nicholls, has she been moved?" I asked

"I don't think so. I'll ask her doctor"

The blonde happy go lucky nurse went off and came back with Ivy's doctor a few minutes later. She hadn't been taken anywhere. Please don't have run off. Please don't have run off. I silently prayed. We went and checked the cameras she'd been seen walking out of the main entrance.

"It's okay. I'll go find her"

I rushed downstairs and walked out of the same entrance that Ivy had left from and looked around. It was pouring down with rain; it had only been drizzling when I came in so I'd left my umbrella in the car. I was about to go back inside when I spotted her sat on a bench. I approached her slowly and sat down beside her.

"Hi" I said

"Hi" she replied

"What are you doing out here?"

"Thinking"

"About what?"

"You"

"What about me?" I was really curious now

"If there's anyway that I can avoid losing you"

"What? You're not going to lose me"

"What about when I stop seeing you as a patient"

She didn't say anything.

She stood up and walked back inside.

(Ivy's POV)

The next day I was glad to get back to normal. I went to school early. I'd barely said anything to Lara the past 24 hours. I sat in registration as Miss Shackleton did the register, there was a knock on the door and I saw Miss Mason through the glass.

"Could I borrow Ivy for a couple of minutes?" she asked

I stood up and went outside.

"I just wanted to see how you're doing? You've had a tough few days" Miss Mason said

"I'm fine just want to get back to normal" I mumbled

"I heard you had a bit of an altercation with Lara?"

"No offence Miss I know you're trying to help but please just don't" I said

"Okay I'm here if you need a little help"

"I don't think this can be fixed"

"There's always a way" she replied

I don't know how I got through the first two classes. 3&4 we had p.e. Basket ball again yet I couldn't even get one basket. Not one.

"Ivy! Bench" Mr Clarkson shouted after blowing his whistle "Amy take Ivy's place!"

"See you can't even do that right" She sniggered as she walked past

I wanted to hit her but she was right. I carried on walking straight past the bench and inside. Mr Clarkson blew his whistle.

"Ivy wait!" he yelled

I stopped and he came over.

"What was that? You're one of the best players in this class"

"Stick your stupid class!" I yelled

I went inside, crashing through the door.

"Ivy?" Miss Campbell said

"What is wrong with you people? Why can't you just leave me the fuck alone!" I yelled

"Calm down. Why don't you come and sit in my office?"


	6. Chapter 6

(Sam's POV)

Ivy was begining to lose it her temper especially and it was getting worse since she stopped seeing Lara.

"Ivy! Can you come down here!?" I called

Rachel had helped me come up with an idea. Ivy came down and walked in the living room. I closed the door and leant against it, as I thought she took one look at Lara and spun on her heels.

"Let me out" she said at normal level

I stood firm and didn't move.

"You need to talk this through, I know how much you rely on Lara and she cares about you. So just...stop pushing everyone away"

"I don't NEED to do anything"

"Okay you don't want to hear this but i'm going to say it anyway. You need Lara's help. I'm trying to be a good parent to you but you're making it very hard. You cannot keep going off the rails and acting like some spoilt child everytime someone says something you don't like or gives you a funny look" I said

"Spoilt child? SPOILT CHILD? How would you know how I act? You're never here!"

"Guys lets just all calm down for a minute?" Lara suggested

"No if you hate it here so much-If you hate me that much..." I opened the door and stepped to one side gesturing to the doorway

(Ivy's POV)

I wasn't staying here I wasn't a spoilt child! How could she say that? I'd changed into some skinny jeans a t-shirt, hoodie and my pink vans when I got home. I opened the front door and turned before flinging my phone down the hallway. I didn't need anything from her. Then I ran down the street after slamming the front door.

"IVY!" Lara called

But I ignored her I wasn't going back there not now not ever.

I ran to the only place I could think of. School...and hoisted myself over the gate. I climbed up onto the roof and broke the window of the toilets by the canteen before lowering myself through, a shard of glass snagged on my leg and I fell. It had cut through my jeans and into my leg. I rested for a bit on the floor silenty screaming in pain. Not daring to voice my screams incase someone was here.

I'd sleep here tonight and then move on in the morning. Strangely the cool blood seeping into my jeans was comforting.

I woke in the morning, my whole body aching from the hard floor. My leg had dried up but that made it more painful. I had to find a way to get out there was no way I was going to make it back over that gate. I had no choice, I hid in the toilets until form started then I snook out of the fire door near the canteen and ran the best I could.

(Lara's POV)

Sam had gotten a lot off her chest last night and she was regretting it now. Ivy still hadn't come back, she'd smashed her phone so we had no way of contacting her. I'd been driving around all night looking for her but hadn't had any luck so far. My guess was, she didn't want to be found and I wondered if she'd ever go home. I eventually had to give in and drive home, the tiredness was overwhelming me and it was more likely that i'd crash my car before I found Ivy. My phone rung jolting me from my thoughts.

_**Unknown number...**_

"Hello?" I answered

There was no reply just someone breathing heavily and sobbing.

"Ivy? Is it you? Talk to me sweetheart?"

The line then went dead.

(Ivy's POV)

I stood in the phone box. What was I thinking the first thing she'd do was call Sam. Well it didn't seem like Sam wanted me anyway. And I didn't want her to want me. I never wanted to see any of them again. Ever. I found a corner shop, they didn't sell much which meant it would be an easy target. I grabbed some bandages and pretended to be looking at the packet. The shop keeper was oblivious to what I was doing and happily typed away on his phone. I slipped the bandages inside my hoodie and walked up to the counter.

"Do you have any raspberry ripple ice cream?" I asked knowing full well he didn't

"No we only have vanilla, chocolate and strawberry" he replied

"Okay thanks anyway"

I left the shop walking down the road, looking behind me every so often to make sure no one was following me. There was some public toilets not far from here. I just had to make it there.

I locked myself in a cubicle and pulled my jeans down to my ankles. I opened the bandages and began to wrap them around my leg fighting sobs that threatened to ruin my composure. I tied the bandages off. It wasn't brilliant but it would have to do for now.

(Sam's POV)

Lara and I had searched everywhere between us. All her friends.

Michaela White

Bolton Smilie

Paul Langley

Sambuca Kelly

Lauren Andrews

Danielle Harker

Aleesha Dillon

We'd checked school, none of the teachers had seen her including Rachel and Kim. Rachel had mentioned something though. A toilet window had been broken and there was blood on the glass. I could only pray it had nothing to do with Ivy, I'd never forgive myself if she was hurt. I already felt terrible, I didn't mean anything I said. I only said it because I thought she'd do the opposite.

(Ivy's POV)

I couldn't go back to school they'd have noticed the window by now, I had to keep moving. Even if Sam or Lara went to the police they wouldn't do anything for 24 hours. That gave me a hed start. I didn't have a plan. I didn't have anything. I was living day to day going wherever life took me but I was cold and hungry.

I found an old house, it had been boarded up and was completely deserted. I kicked one of the boards in painfully as each knock vibrated up my leg and caused more and more damage.

The house was mainly empty, there was an old mattress that smelled like pee and alcohol and needles scattered on the floor. I settled on the floor in a corner as far away from the druggie mess as possible. My stomach gurgled noisily as I closed my eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

(Lara's POV)

Sam was a mess, she was worried sick about Ivy. She'd let me call the police but as we all sat in the living room with PC Mason and PC Falcon she froze.

"How long has your daughter been missing?" PC Mason asked

Sam didn't answer, the tears spilled from her eyes and she sobbed. I took her hand and squeezed it gently.

"A little over 48 hours" I answered for her

"Can you remember what she was wearing when she went missing?"

"Um pale blue jeans, a pink hoodie and pink shoes" I answered trying to remember Ivy the last time I saw her

"Can you think of any reason why she might have run away?"

"We had a fight..." They were the first words Sam muttered

(Ivy's POV)

I'd been walking all day and my leg was throbbing, I was on the verge of consciousness and I didn't know where I was. I had a feeling I was still in Rochdale. But I couldn't go on any further, I slumped against a wall breathing heavily, I kept drifting in and out from the real world. Why had I smashed that stupid window?

(Lara's POV)

I got a call early the next morning well Sam did but she couldn't answer it. It was the police some of their collegues had picked up someone on the outskirts of Rochdale. She was refusing medical treatment and they wanted us to confirm it was Ivy. If it wasn't then the search continued if it was then we had to find a way through this...

We drove to the police station to pick Ivy up.

(Ivy's POV)

It was over they'd come for me soon and I couldn't get away. I didn't want to see anyone, I wanted the ground to swallow me or get probed by aliens or anything so I wouldn't have to face them.

_**~ The next day ~**_

Things between me and Sam weren't great in fact she'd even spoken to Rachel about her 'concerns'. They'd agreed I could go and stay in the new school house. I wasn't happy but my opinion didn't matter. I hadn't seen Lara since we left the police station...I'd never felt more alone in my life. I stood here now packing my stuff into a bag trying to contain the tears. I was so tired of being abandoned. Sam drove me to thr schoolhouse herself (Probably to make sure I got there).

"Aren't you coming in?" I asked

"I can't I have to get to work. Behave and I'll come and see you tomorrow"

I closed the car door and watched as it drove off into the distance. I turned and was greeted by Miss Mason, Miss Campbell and Mr Mead. The school house was brand new and didn't have many inhabitants. There was Sam Kelly, Paul Langley, Denzil Kelly, Luke Pendle, Lindsay James and...me. There were 2 students to every room and each room had an en suite bathroom.

Sam and Denzil were brother and sister and insisted on bunking together. Which due to gender rules left Paul and Luke together. And that left me with...Lindsay. Miss Campbell thought it would be good for us. I on the other hand begged to differ. Lindsay James was a coldhearted, manipulative bitch.

I had enough time to unpack before Lindsay returned from school, I'd had the day off. She knew of the arrangement but instead of kicking off she just blanked me. Once bedtime came I went into the bathroom and locked the door. I dialled Lara's number. The dialling tone sounded but then it rang off.

_**'Hi you've reached Lara Stone, sorry I can't get to the phone right now but leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can'**_

"Lara" I choked out "What's going on? You said you'd always be there...Why haven't you spoken to me for days? I've lost Sam. I know that but please...please...not you too" I put the phone down and the sobs overwhelmed me completely. I felt so alone.


	8. Chapter 8

(Ivy's POV)

It was official. Life sucked. I hadn't slept very well even after I was done crying. Lindsay hadn't said anything even though I knew my crying kept her awake. I started to wonder if all that bravado was for Siobhan and Amy's sake? At breakfast everyone was tucking into bacon and toast and cereal made by Miss Campbell and Mr Mead. They were the two that ran the place.

I sat down at a table by myself with a glass of water. I wasn't hungry. In fact I felt a little sick. I was trying to fight back the tears that so desperately wanted to get out. Miss Campbell sat in a chair opposite me.

"Ivy? You not going to have something to eat?" she asked

"I'm not hungry" I mumbled

"Okay" she replied

"Actually I think i'm going to go to school early, I have some stuff to catch up on"

I walked the short journey to school and sat on the steps outside the main entrance. There was no one else about yet, I heard the silent hum of the engine and the crumbling of the tyres on the drive and then I looked up to see the navy blue audi TT parked in front of me. Miss Mason climbed out.

"Hey, you're early" she said

"I need to catch up"

"I know you're a bit behind but burying your head in schoolwork won't solve anything. If you need anything come and speak to me or Miss Campbell?"

I was trying so hard to conceal the tears but inside I was crumbling. My whole word was falling apart, I didn't know which way was up anymore.

"Thanks I'll bear that in mind" I said rushing into the school building.

I rushed to the library and book three ring binders out of my bag. The three main subjects; English, Maths, Science. They were also the three I was furthest behind in. I began working through the huge pile of backlogue.

First class I had a free period then French, Miss Haydock asked me a question and when I couldn't answer it she told me I needed to concentrate more in class. Then after break I had biology and Mrs Diamond kept me behind to explain why I hadn't handed my project in for the third time in a row. I was then late for art with Miss Campbell. I ran down the corridor and tripped on my bag strap which had made itself down off my shoulder. I landed face first on the ground my files going flying. That was it I sat on my knees on the ground and crumbled ad tears overwhelmed me.

"You alright?" A voice asked

I looked up to see Luke Pendle, he held out his hand and I took it. He pulled me to my feet before bending back down to pick up my folders.

"Thanks" I sniffed

"Listen I know what it's like to get dumped back in care time and time again. So if you need to talk..."

"Thanks but i've had a lot of offers and I don't really know you"

"Let me take you to Miss Mason at least?"

"It's okay she'll be busy and I need to get to class, I'm already late" I gave him a small smile

I rushed to art and went in.

"Ivy. Nice of you to join us" Miss Campbell said

"Sorry" I looked at her and her face changed

"It's okay go sit down I'll speak to you later"

(Kim's POV)

Ivy had been crying I could see it in her eyes and to be honest she looked like she was barely holding it together now. I tried to talk to her at the end of class but she wasn't having it. She told me she had detention with Chris, somethis about a science project. I went to Rachel straight after, she was sat there at her desk staring into space.

"Rachel!?" I said

She came out of her trance.

"Sorry I was thinking about Ivy"

"Me too, Rachel I don't think it's right that we keep this from her. She deserves to know! She thinks it's her fault" I argued

"What? That her foster mother dumped her because she's pregnant and she's moved her boyfriend in? Oh and while we're at it they've told Lara to stay away!"

I could see the anger in Rachel's eyes.

"Liars!"

I spun round to see Ivy.

"You're twisting everything! Sam wouldn't do that"

"Ivy..." I tried to reason with her

"No!"

She ran out.

"Ivy!?" I called after her

"Leave me alone!" She yelled

(Ivy's POV)

I didn't believe them. Sam wouldn't...Lara wouldn't! I pulled out my phone and hid my number then I dialled Sam.

"Hello?" Sam's voice came from the other end

"Is it true?" I demanded

"Ivy?"

"I said is it true?" I demanded again

"Is what true?"

"Don't play dumb! Are you pregnant?"

She sighed "Yes"

"Did you tell Lara to stay away?"

"Yeah. I just thought you'd want some space"

"NO!" I screamed "YOU DON'T GET TO TURN THIS ON ME YOU SELFISH BITCH! I TRUSTED YOU!" I screamed

"Who's that?" A male voice asked in the background

There was rustling and then a male voice answered.

"Listen you selfish little brat stop harassing my girlfriend. She'd pregnant she doesn't need to be stressed out by your childish attention seeking rubbish. Leave us alone."

Then the line went dead.

I felt like I'd been torn in two. Why? That was all I could ask myself. I threw my phone which shattered against the wall, landing on the floor in pieces.


	9. Chapter 9

(Ivy's POV)

I stayed up most of the night sat downstairs at one of the tables in the dining room, I was trying to get my project done for Mr Mead. But I was finding it hard to concentrate. Before I knew it, it was 6am and Miss Mason walked in.

"Ivy? You're up early" she said

She sat down opposite me as I continued to scribble away.

"What are you doing here?" I asked

"Mr Mead had somewhere to be so i'm helping out"

I was only have listening as I was too busy manickly scribbling out my project.

"Ivy have you slept at all?" she asked

"Yeah course" I replied

She placed a hand on mine stopping me from writing and her other hand under my chin forcing me to look her in the eye, I could tell she didn't believe me.

"I don't need sleep. I need GCSE's and A levels so I can get a job and look after myself" I admitted

She let go and I continued to scribble.

"As opposed to what? Trusting someone? Letting someone in? Ivy everything always looks worse when you're tired. I'll sign you off sick for the day. Get some sleep, get a shower and have something proper to eat?" She said

"No thanks. I don't need special treatment"

"Ivy you can't keep pushing people away"

"What am I supposed to do? Trust someone? Let someone in?"

"Yes" she agreed

"Love them? Get close to them? Care about them! Move in! And get dumped!" I said raising my voice

"Ivy calm down"

"Don't tell me what to do!" I yelled

I slung my bag over my shoulder and gathered my papers into a messy pile and went to school early, and sat in the library I finally got it finished and got it typed up and printed. Then I ran to Mr Mead to hand it in. It was a really long few minutes while he read through it.

"It's good" he said

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hand it in on time next time"

I went back to the library and put my head on the desk for just a few minutes...

(Luke's POV)

I went into the library to use the computer. Some of the Ex John Foster's girls including Amy and Siobhan were sniggering and pointing.

"What a loser no wonder nobody wants her" Amy sniggered

My gaze drifted to Ivy who was fast asleep at a table in the corner.

"Get out of here" I said to them and they laughed before walking off.

"Ivy. Ivy wake up" I said shaking her gently

I picked up her bag and put it on ny shoulder. Before helping a stunned Ivy to her feet. I took her to the office.

"Luke?" Miss Mason asked

"I didn't know where else to take her. She was asleep in the library"

"Thanks Luke"

(Ivy's POV)

Rachel sat me down, and handed me a cup of coffee. I was still half asleep and I picked up the coffee trying to wake myself up.

(Rachel's POV)

"Ivy...it's okay to admit that you need time to adjust. What happened with Sam wasn't fair and I know you've been through a lot this past year but, you're not made of stone and burying your head in your schoolwork won't help. You need to eat properly and sleep properly and socialise and I don't think bottling up your problems up is a good idea"

"I'm sorry about earlier, I was just angry. After Hayley and Nathan I thought Sam would be different. I thought she got it and then Lara...I'm tired of trusting people that let me down" A few tears spilled over the edge and dripped down my cheeks.

"I know but I made you a promise when you started here that i'd never give up on you. Do you remember that?" she asked I nodded

I nodded "No matter how hard I pushed you"

"Yes and that means i'm here for you whether that's talking, or a coffee or a hug or an hour in the cooler"

I laughed gently even though the tears were still flowing quickly.

"Thanks Miss" I hugged her softly

"The one thing I don't need from you is truanting okay? If there's a problem come and talk to me"

"Alright"

"It friday, make sure you have some fun this weekend okay?"

"Alright"

"Work in the library this afternoon have some time to yourself. I'll let your teachers know"

"Actually can I just go home? I know you're not supposed to let me but..."

"Okay then"

_**A/N: Hi guys. Reviews are more than welcome. If anyone has any suggestions as to what they'd like to happen feel free to add it in a review or PM me, I'm starting to get a little writer's block.**_


	10. Chapter 10

(Ivy's POV)

It was the strangest feeling ever, opening my eyes and seeing where I was...The pale blue sky so beautiful it was almost blinding as my eyes adjusted. Then the little bewildered dreamworld disappeared and reality hit me. The flurry of people. The car. The cold, hard ground. The pain. I didn't understand I'd been walking home, I remembered stepping off the pavement to cross the road and then it was a blur. I didn't know what had happened. My arms were the most intense pain and my chest. My legs were fine, I couldn't feel pain there. I thought about it for a minute...I couldn't feel the pain but I couldn't feel anything else either...

The pain was so much and it felt like I'd been crushed, on the top half anyway. I wanted Rachel or anyone I knew, all the people around me were strangers and being surrounded by them freaked me out a little. Then I heard the sirens, I hadn't even thought of the consequences of the accident. Having to go to the hospital...Where Sam and her new boyfriend were. At that moment I hoped I'd dir on the road or end up in some deep coma. Anything so I wouldn't have to see her face again. I was really grateful when thr pain became too much and I blacked out.

I woke to the repetative tapping of trolley wheels on cracks in the pavement and all I could see above me where bright lights passing by. I felt like one of those inflatable puppets they put out to advertise garages that blew everywhere in the wind. But the only way I could see was up because my head was fixed to a board.

"What have we got?" Sam said

"No!" I yelled against the mask "Get her away from me! I want to see a different doctor!"

I heard a sigh. "Fine. I'll get Zoe" she said but I had a feeling it wasn't for my benefit.

The rest of them took me into resus but they didn't move me off the spinal board.

"Everybody got a bit?" A voice asked which from the accent I knew it was Linda. I vouldn't see faces which wad the worst bit.

They moved me across and the doors swung open.

"Right i'm here. What have we got?" I assumed it was Dr Hanna, I'd only met het once.

"This is Ivy, 15 hit by a fast moving car. Complaining of pain to the arms and chest. She was KO'ed for about 15 minutes. GCS 5, BP 180/30, sats 91% and pulse 70" One of the paramedics said.

"Hi Ivy do you remember me?" Dr Hanna asked

"Yeah" I groaned

"Does it hurt anywhere other than your chest and arms?" she asked

"My head a bit. But I can't feel my legs" I said

I was scared now, I wouldn't care if my legs were hanging off and it was the most excruciating pain ever but this...I couldn't feel anything. I'd watched enough episodes of 24hrs in A&E and Grey's anatomy yo know that meant there was something wrong with my back. Was I going to die? Would I be able to walk?

"Can I have FBC's, U's, E's, LFT's, Group and save please? And I want her booked in to X-ray and MRI ASAP" she said "Can we also give her 10 of morphine and 10 of ketamine"

Dr Hanna snapped on some latex gloves and tapped my arm after tightening some weird strappy thing around it and then she stuck a cannula in the inside of my elbow. She was handed a syringe by a nurse which she injected in and then did the same with another syringe. It took about a minute for the drugs to take effect and a warm fuzzy feeling washed over me.

"Ivy is there anyone we can call for you?" Linda asked

"Miss Mason. The number's in my phone"

Linda went in my bag and got my phone just after she left the monitor began to beep.

"Sats are down to 87%" Another nurse told Dr Hanna.

I could see this one, her badge said Tess Bateman.

"Okay, can we up the oxygen to 15 please" Dr Hanna asked

"Your teacher's on her way" Linda said "And X-ray and MRI are ready" she told Dr Hanna.

"We're going to have a little delay, I want her stabilised before she's moved"

(Rachel's POV)

I'd just gotten off the phone to the hospital. Ivy had been in an accident. I ran down the corridor with my bag and coat in hand, Chris and Kim were talking some stuff over in Kim's office. I ran in.

"Ivy's been in an accident. Can you keep this place running?" I asked

"Yeah course go" Kim answered

"Thanks"

"Keep us updated" Chris said

"Yep" I called over my shoulder as I ran out to the car.

When I got there I went straight for reception.

"Um Ivy Greene, she was brought in by ambulance erm road accident" I told the man

"If you'd like to take a seat. I'll get someone to come and speak to you"

"Rachel?" Zoe said "It's okay Noel I've got this"

She took me to one side.

"Ivy's fractured both of her arms and she's got a few broken ribs she's stable but our min concern is her spine. She has a tiny fracture at the bottom of her spine, at the moment she has no feeling in her legs this may come back over time but..."

"...it might not" I answered

"Exactly"

I heard two familiar voices arguing and I stopped to listen for a minute.

"You have no right to come here"

"Oh I have every right. I'm the psychiatrist for this hospital and I was Ivy's psychiatrist too before you fired me"

"You weren't needed"

"Well she needed someone and seeing as though you dumped her..."

"Well I didn't see you running to the rescue"

"You told me to stay away"

"You didn't have to listen!"

"You said you'd ring the police! I'd have lost my job. Everything. What good would I have been to her then?"

"About as much good as you were before"

"How dare you! I only ever tried to do what was best for that girl and you were the same until you got with him"

"Don't bring Tom into this, that girl was an unfixable little brat. I tried"

"Oh do me a favour!"

"She's in here and you didn't even know. Shows how much you care"

"What?"

"RTA probably another one of her attention seeking stunts"

"I'm glad you dumped her otherwise she might have turned out as poisonous as you!"

Of course it was Sam and Lara.


	11. Chapter 11

(Ivy's POV)

I had two broken arms which were now in black plaster casts, black being my colour of choice. 4 broken ribs and a broken back. The bruising had strted to come out and I looked horrible, the two black eyes took up most of my face and made me look like a panda. Miss Mason was here, I'd seen her but it wasn't the same as having a mum. I needed someone to tell me it was going to be okay.

I was glad to get off the spinal board it meant I could see the world again. Miss Mason came back in.

"I'm going to go back to the school house and get you some stuff" she said

I thought it was weird and a bit random that she was going right now at this moment in time. It was 2:30 in the afternoon. Then the door opened and someone walked in. Resus was empty all except for me and Dr Hanna who was looking at clipboards and monitors.

"Hi" the familiar australian voice said

I don't know why but a surge of anger rushed through my blood and I was suddenly really pissed off.

"What do you want?" I asked bitterly

"I know your angry, I would be too but let me explain please. 5 minutes and then if you still hate me i'll go"

I sighed. What was 5 minutes it's not like I had anything better to do.

"I'm counting" I mumbled

"I know I hurt you. But please believe me when I say I had no choice" she started

I scoffed. "You always have a choice"

"Sam fired me and told me to stay away"

"See you CHOSE to listen"

"Ivy be reasonable here. She threatened to call the police if I came near you. I'd have lost my job and everything"

"So what's changed?" I asked

"I got a solicitor and we've sorted it"

"Sorted it how?"

"I'm not here as a psychiatrist, I'm here as a friend, someone you look to for guidance, someone you can come to"

"Oh you mean someone I can trust?"

"Yeah"

"So you can dump me again"

"No..."

"I'm tired of giving everyone second chances so they can throw it back in my face"

"That's understandable"

"If I trust you again I don't need a promise that you won't leave me again. I need a guarantee"

About an hour later Lara and Rachel had gone to get something to eat and Dr Hanna had gone to do something. This was my chance I knew I could do it. I just had to try. I pulled back the covers and lifted my legs over the side of the trolley then I used the strength in my arms to stand it wasn't much and it hurt but I stood. I smiled and let go. I knew I could do it!

My glory was short lived because as fast as I made it up I was soon falling down again. My head smacked against the floor and I pressed my hand to my head to try and cushion the blow but I felt wetness and looked to see my hand was red. I couldn't move either, I tried to rollover but only the top half of me complied. I couldn't breathe, it was like I was trying but nothing was working.

(Zoe's POV)

I came back from chasing up Ivy's notes to find her on the floor covered in blood and breathing ast shallow breathes. I pushed the door open.

"Can I have some help in here please!"

Linda was the only one close, luckily Ivy didn't weigh much and therefore the two of us were able to lift her. The trolley was laid flat and I put a mask on her.

"Looks like a tension pneumothorax, can I have a chest drain set please?" I asked Linda

I pulled on a theatre gown and some fresh gloves. I raised Ivy's arm above her head.

"I need you to keep your arm there okay?"

"mmm" Ivy groaned

"This is going to hurt a bit but it'll help your breathing and I'll be as quick as I can"

I didn't have time to wait for the anaesthetic to take hold.

"You can hold my hand if you want?" Linda offered and a terrified Ivy accepted.

I made an incision down the right side of Ivy's rib cage. She seemed okay with that and actually seemed to find some relief in it. She gritted her teeth tight as I pushed the tube in and finnally as it went into her lung she let out a cry of pain.

"I know. I know. I'm sorry, nearly done. I promise" I tried to comfort her.

I secure the tube and the fluid started to drain. Her breathing started to stablise.

"Sats are up to 85%" Linda confirmed "And rising"

"What were you doing?" I asked when her breathing was back to full capacity.

"Trying to walk" she admitted

"Do you realise the damage you could have done to your back? And what if I hadn't found you?"

She wasn't listening and I realised her body was tensed and the effort she was exerting was begining to show on her face, she was still trying to move her legs.

"Ivy?"

She still wasn't listening.

"Ivy!" I said a little louder

"What?"

"Stop. If you cause enough trama to your back then you'll never walk again. You need to give your body chance to heal and nevermind the damage to your spine, look at the damage your doing to the rest of your body"

Then with absolutely no warning Ivy emptied the contents of her stomach. Linda caught it in a kidney tray just in time.

"Okay, Linda can you book Ivy into CT? I want to check for concussion and I'll get this head wound cleaned and stitched"

(Ivy's POV)

As Dr Hanna was cleaning my head the door swung open.

"Wow you look terrible"

I lifted my head to see Luke Pendle. His black jeans were hanging loosely around his waist, his electric blue vans had the laces tucked in, the white tshirt went perfectly with his red checked shirt and his grey beanie hung off his dark hair which was flicked across his face and he looked even more gorgeous.

"What are you doing here?" I asked

"Well seeing as though I only ever seem to see you when your crying or hurt or asleep and I think this counts as one of those"

"You have nothing better to do then come and annoy me?"

"Nope"

"Wow your social life sucks"

"Mine sucks? Looks like you spend yours walking into walls and getting hit by cars"

"Point taken"

He came over and sat next to me. As Dr Hanna numbed my head Luke sat there pulling faces.

"Luke! Not helping" I reached out and slapped him playfully

"Sorry" He grinned


	12. Chapter 12

(Ivy's POV)

I was moved up to the ward later that night, Dr Hanna had pulled some strings so that she could treat me. I had no idea how that worked. Miss Mason drove Luke home something about a curfew.

"So Luke..."

"Don't do this?" I pleaded

"Do what?"

"Go all mummy-ish on me. It's weird"

"It's not weird. He seems nice. He likes you"

"Okay we are not having this conversation"

"You will be safe right?"

"LA LA LA LA LA!" I yelled covering my ears and Lara laughed

Dr Hanna came to check on ne which meant examining my legs again. All the way down my legs was the same but when she felt the bottom of my feet I kicked out.

"Sorry I hate people touching my feet" I said then I realised what I'd just done.

I tried to do it again and I could wiggle my toes.

"Stay in bed. Your progress is good but don't push it. I'm back on shift in the morning"

"Okay"

Of course I was lying, and I spent the night try to do more and more. By the morning I could walk slowly. About 2:30am I went to sleep. I spent the next day walking round getting my legs stronger, I felt normal again.

(Luke's POV)

It was saturday night and I had been planning on taking Ivy to the cinema but obviously she couldn't so wearing what I would have worn to the cinema, which was black jeans, white top and leather jacket I walked into the hospital armed with everything I needed to bring the fun to Ivy. I'd talked it through with Miss Mason so we'd be alone. I knocked and poked my head through the door.

"What are you doing here?"

"I told you I have no social life and I was going to take you to the cinema but you can't go so I brought it to you"

I placed my laptop on th table and gave Ivy the popcorn and maltesers. Then went through the films.

"So we have...The hunger games, Girl, Interrupted, Thirteen, I am number four, Twilight..."

"I can't believe you own twilight"

"I don't I borrowed it from Sam" He grinned

"Okay. Hunger games" she decided

I took a seat next to her bed.

At the end of the film, Ivy looked at me.

"Thanks for today" she smiled

"S'Okay"

I leant in and kissed her softly.

(Ivy's POV)

Oh no...this wasn't what I wanted. I mean I didn't mean to lead him on. I pulled away slowly. I could see the hurt on his face.

"I like you I do. But it's not the right time"

He started packing up his laptop quickly and slung the bag over his shoulder.

"It's cool I'll see you later yeah? Y'know curfew" with that he rushed out.

I rushed to the door but he was gone and he'd left his jacket. He couldn't get away fast enough. I walked down the corridor as fast as I could and bumped into Dr Hanna.

"What are you doing out of bed?"

"I need to go after him please"

"Give him some time and call him"

She took me back to bed.

_**~ 3 Weeks Later ~**_

Lara drove me back to Waterloo road after I was released. My legs were almost perfect again but I still had to see the physio every week. The bruising had disappeared, evrnthough I still had the odd scratch and two casts I was on the mend.

"Thanks for dropping me off" I called as I ran up the stairs

I banged on Luke's door.

"Luke! It's me!"

I knew he was in there.

"Luke? Please I just wanna talk"

Still no answer.

"You know what? Fine! I'm done running round after you. Call me when you've grown up!"


	13. Chapter 13

(Ivy's POV)

My first day back was going pretty well actually, I'd been on time to every class and I hadn't been in trouble. I was surprised that I hadn't missed that much work. I'd just been to the toilet in registration and was on my way to mentoring with Miss Mason. Out of nowhere I was slammed up against the wall. It was Micheala and she had my arm across my throat.

"What are you doing?" I asked

"Teaching you a lesson"

"For what? You're my best mate"

"I thought I was but you're one of them"

"One of who?"

"Don't play dumb! Sharing a room with Lindsay! Shacking up with Luke Pendle"

I pushed her off.

"Campbell made me shack up with Lindsay and there's nothing going on between me and Luke and if there was it's none of your business"

"You what?"

"You heard"

"Dunno why Paul's so cut up about you you're just another John Fosters slapper"

I lunged for her and she grabbed my hair, I grabbed hers pulling her down with me and slamming her against the wall. She clawed my face with her nails and it stung.

"Oi you two enough!" Mr Clarkson bellowed as he pulled us apart "What the hell are you playing at?"

"Nothing" Micheala said

"Nothing sir" I added

"Why are you always in the middle of these scraps Ivy?" he asked

"What!? It wasn't even me-" I sighed "Nevermind"

"Well you can explain yourselves to Miss Mason"

He marched us to Miss Mason's office. She wasn't even angry she just had that look of disappointment on her face.

"Well? What happened?" she asked

Neither me nor Micheala said anything.

"Micheala go and wait in the cooler. You can write me an explanation. Ivy with me."

Mr Clarkson escorted Micheala off and Rachel made me follow her.

"Where are we going?" I asked

"To the nurse"

"I don't need a nurse it's just a scratch"

I was ignored and she forced me to have it looked at.

(Lara's POV)

It was coming up to lunchtime and I'd just seen my last patient when I got a phone call.

"Hello?" I answered

"Hi. Will you come and pick me up?"

"Why what's wrong?"

"I don't feel well"

"Is that a 'I feel ill' or a 'it's my first day back and it's not going well' illness?" I asked

"Bit...of...both"

"Ivy we talked about this..."

"Please! Can't you make up a hospital appointment or something?"

"What happened? You're not in trouble already are you?"

"Sort of. It wasn't actually my fault-I know I say that alot but this time i'm serious"

"Ivy you have to give it a chance. I know it's hard but you have to try. Please. For me?"

"Whatever. Thanks for nothing"

She put the phone down on me.

I then rung the school, it took a while before someone answered.

"Hello Rachel Mason's office, Kim Campbell head of pastoral care speaking..."

"Hi Kim it's Lara. Is Rachel around?"

"No i'm afraid not she's in a meeting"

(Ivy's POV)

I'd been sat in the toilets crying for the last half an hour. I thought Lara would bail me out at least.

"Ivy?" A familiar female voice asked

I didn't reply.

"Ivy? It's Miss Campbell"

"I know who it is" I mumbled

"Are you going to come out and talk to me?"

Again I didn't reply.

"I heard it was a pretty tough first day back?"

"I guess you could say that. I got into a fight with my best friend...well ex-best friend"

"You'll sort things out"

"How? I share a room with my worst enemy. Luke isn't even speaking to me. Micheala hates me because of all that..."

"Okay...well hiding in a toilet isn't going to solve that is it?"

I opened the door.

(Lindsay's POV)

I spotted Ivy walking a few feet ahead of me, she seemed a bit depressed. I'd been on my way to the toilet earlier when I saw her tearing chunks out of Micheala. Maybe she wasn't so bad. Maybe she could be one of us. I just had to get her onside.

"Ivy!" I yelled

She turned.

"What do you want?"

"No trouble promise. Figured seeing as though we have to share a room may as well make an effort"

"Yeah...right" she didn't sound convinced

"Look I know what it's like to get dumped by your parents and I know a way to get Luke back"

_**A/N: Let me know what you think guys and if you're still interested in this story...**_


	14. Chapter 14

(Rachel's POV)

I had, had enough. That was it. The gang rivalry was finished. I had sent notes round to morning registers asking to see a list of people.

Micheala White

Sambuca Kelly

Lauren Andrews

Ivy Greene

Lindsay James

Amy Porter

Siobhan Mailey

And now they were all sat in a row in the cooler, everyone except Ivy. The 'Waterloo road' girls on one side. Micheala, Lauren and Sam. And the 'John Fosters' girls on the other side. Lindsay, Amy and Siobhan. When Ivy came in she sat with the John Fosters girls, to Amy's disgust but Lindsay smiled and greeted her. Micheala just sat there with a sour look on her face.

Ivy looked different today the brunette hair with the blue streaks had gone. It was completely black like the pots on her arms and she wore tights instead of her usual socks. Her tie was done up and her blazer fastened. Her skin looked paler than usual and in addition to her normal ear piercings she now had a small metal bar stuck through the top of her ear.

"This gang stuff it stops. Now." I began "The next person in this room to start a fight will be suspended"

Siobhan, Amy, Sam and Lauren nodded leaving Micheala and Lindsay glaring at each other and Ivy in her own world.

"Sam, Amy, Lauren, Siobhan get to class" The four of them stood and filed out the room, an early sign that my warning had worked.

(Ivy's POV)

As I opened my locker a piece of paper fell out. I crouched to the floor slipping my ringbinders under my arm so my hands were free. I opened the folded bit of paper to see in the centre the words...

_**Two-faced slapper**_

A fire brewed inside me as I threw my files in my locker and took out some red spray paint before slamming it shut. That was it! The bitch was going to pay. I rolled up my sleeves and took the lid off shaking the can.

"Ivy!"

I jumped and turned to see Miss Mason on her way down the stairs. I made a run for it but she caught my arm, she took the paint from my hand.

"My office. Now."

She escorted me up to ger office, where she placed the spray paint on her desk.

"Well?" she said unimpressed

I didn't say anything.

"Ivy I don't know what is going on but you had better come up with a good explanation for this otherwise I have no option but to suspend you"

"Suspend me? For what!?"

"Ivy I think we both agree I've been very leanient on you, I know you've had a hard time but you are trying your best to push me away"

"Listen I don't need you to look after me. I'm not some stupid kid!" I said

(Rachel's POV)

I could see it in her eyes she was so close to breaking and I could tell she wanted to.

"Take a seat because we aren't leaving until you talk"

"Don't you have a school to run?"

"Not right now. Take a seat"

"I'm not staying"

"Yes you are sit down"

She opened the door.

"Ivy you walk out that door and that's it. I will exclude you"

She stopped, of course I was bluffing but I wanted to see if she'd really throw her future away.

"Here you are and yet you still don't get it! I don't care. I've moved school loads of times why would I care now?"

"Because Ivy although you think you're tough, you're not. I think you like it here. You have friends, Luke, Lara"

She sat down and folded her arms.

"What were you doing with the spray paint?"

"I was going to write slut on Micheala's locker. Happy now?"

"No! What the hell were you thinking? We've just had a conversation about stopping this rivalry"

"This isn't rivalry. It's between me and Micheala"

"It's between nobody. This ends now."

She said nothing just rolled her eyes.

"Come on. Lets go"

"Where are we going?"

"3rd period art"

"What you're coming?"

"Yes. Until you prove you can behave"

(Ivy's POV)

I sloped into art and sat down putting my head on the desk. Miss Campbell came over.

"Morning Ivy, we're designing our own patterned skulls this morning as part of our day of the dead topic"

I kept my head on the desk.

"Ivy..." Miss Mason warned

I sat up, just at the right time for Micheala to "trip" and fling blue paint all over me. I picked up a tub of red and slowly dumped it on her hair.

"Enough!" Miss Mason said "Go an get cleaned up the pair of you!"

"She did that on purpose!" I yelled

"Just reminding you that your one of them"

I lunged for her but Miss Campbell stepped in the way.

"Ivy go and wait in my office" Miss Campbell said

_**A/N: Thank you to those lovely people who left me those really nice revoews on my last chapter, I hope I've done the story justice with this chapter. And again thanks :)**_


	15. Chapter 15

(Ivy's POV)

I sat at a table in the dining room poking at my dinner. Which tonight was sausages, mash and peas with gravy. Luke approached me with a plate of food in his hand.

"Can I sit here?" He asked

"Free country. Sit where you want" I told him and he took that as a yes.

"I'm surprised you bothered to ask. I thought I didn't exist to you"

"I know I handled things badly but I thought you liked me and then you said..."

"I did like you It was too soon after Paul and I barely knew you I wanted us to be friends first"

"I get that but why didn't you just say that?"

"Cause you didn't give me chance!" I said raising my voice

"Give me a chance to prove i'm serious?"

I dumped the remaining mash and gravy on his head.

"Does that answer your question?" I asked

I went up to my room and sat on my bed dialling lara.

"Heeello?" she answered

"Lara?"

"Ivy whats up honey?"

"Can you come round I really need to talk?"

"I'm sorry darling I have some more patients to see"

"Oh what so now i'm not a 'patient' you don't care?"

"Ivy..."

"Oh forget it!"

I hung up and it was then I felt like I may have been a little harsh and taken everything out on her. It seemed to work though because half an hour later there was a knock on my door. Lara walked in, I stood up.

"I though you had patients?" I asked

"You come first" That really was what I needed to hear

"I'm sorry" I said and she opened her arms which I gladly melted into.

"I think we need to have a little chat don't you?"

I didn't answer for a minute not knowing if Miss Mason had called her and not wanting to drop myself in it.

"I know everything" she replied, it was like she read my mind.

I let go of her and sloped off back to my bed.

She sat down beside me.

"Ivy...You can't keep kicking off. Find some other way to channel your anger. Take up boxing, join the basketball team, fine art. Anything. Micheala is getting suspended and unless you want to go the same way..." she never finished that sentence.

"Okay alright I'll try harder but I want things to change. You're always working and I never seen you...It's not fair"

"Okay well I'll make you a deal. Tomorrow's friday you behave and after school you can come round to mine and we'll have some girls time. Just us two?"

I sighed "deal"

"Okay enough with the heavy. What's wrong?"

(Rachel's POV)

Monday morning marked the start of my new staff member and the new pupil referal unit. I had just enough time to talk the PRU through with Nikki before assembly.

"It's safe to say they're all troublemakers, most of it stems from the merger with John Fosters. The followers erm, Amy Porter, Siobhan Mailey, Lauren Andrews and Sam Kelly they just listen to the others so sort the leaders and you'll sort them. Luke Pendle, Josh Stevenson, Bolton Smilie and Paul Langley not that bad but can be trouble, more class clowns really. Lindsay and Micheala are the heart of the rivalry and will scrap at anything. Then there's Ivy, she has good days and bad days. She been through a lot and sometimes kicking off is how she deals with it. Any trouble with her send her to me"

"I'm sure I'll handle her fine"

"A little tip, don't go in there all guns blazing because she'll push you"

"I'm sure we'll get along fine"

Don't get me wrong Nikki was a good teacher and she was good with troublemakers but I don't think she got Ivy and it would come back to haunt her. I didn't have time to explain that to her before assembly.

"Good morning everyone! As you know we're opening a new PRU here today and I'd like to welcome Miss Boston who will be running it. I'll let her tell you a little more about it..."

"The PRU is not a punishment. It's desigbed to keep you interested and find the best learning way for you so you can concentrate"

"Blah. Blah. Blahblahblah." Ivy said

I shot her a warning glance but Nikki was there first.

"You. In future you'll speak when spoken to. Run in's with me aren't a pleasant. I wouldn't make a habit of it"

(Ivy's POV)

When the list of pupils got to the PRU Miss Boston wasn't there yet. I decided to take advantage of the new crowd which consisted of:

Lindsay

Luke

Siobhan

Amy

Sam

Micheala

Lauren

Josh

Bolton

Paul

I stood on the desk at the front and picked up a set of keys.

"Today class we'll be discussing the art of selling and what better way than a bit of practical work" I held up the keys "Here we have the keys to a black warrior shall we kick the bidding of at 50p?"

Luke raised his hand

"50p thank you sir"

"A quid" Bolton said and Micheala shot him a warning look

"one fifty" Lindsay said, I knew she didn't want the keys but she saw it as a chance to beat Micheala.

"two fifty" Micheala shot back

"A fiver" Luke offered

"Any advances on five pounds?"

No one answered.

"SOLD!" I yelled as I threw him the keys

"Next we have a pile of assignments. Great for burning, confetti, paper planes and oregami" Boston was going to regret pissing me off "Lets kick things of at 10 pence"

"Yeah" Bolton said

"15" Paul said

"20" Amy said

"50" Lindsay said

"A quid" josh added

"Any advances on one pound?" I asked

Again no answers.

"SOlD"


	16. Chapter 16

(Nikki's POV)

Rachel Mason was full of it. I'd heard about Waterloo road, it was a breeding ground for the next generation of criminals. Don't get me wrong Rachel was good with the kids but disipline was not her strong point. I was sure all this Ivy needed was boundaries and she'd get them from me. As I walked in there was a girl stood on my desk causing havoc in my class...the same troublemaker from this morning.

"GET DOWN NOW!" I yelled

She hesitated but then got down.

"What's your name?" I asked

She didn't answer.

"NAME!"

"Lindsay...James" she mumbled

(Ivy's POV)

As we went around the room everyone gave a different name.

Lindsay was me

Amy was Micheala

Siobhan was Sam

Josh was Bolton

Paul was Luke

Luke was Paul

Bolton was Josh

Lauren was Siobhan

Sam was Amy

"Unfortunately for you I've read all your file s which have your photos on so...Ivy. Wait outside"

I went outside and she followed soon after.

"You are causing me a lot of grief, Miss Mason might take it but I will not"

I turned and ran.

"IVY!" She screamed

I kept running and I could hear fast footsteps behind me. I ran straight in to Miss Mason, who instinctively held both my arms steadying me. Miss Boston grabbed me.

"Get back up there now" she said

"Drop dead" I threw back

"Ivy!" Miss Mason scolded "It's not even half nine. Okay my office. It's okay Nikki I'll deal with her"

Miss Boston wasn't happy but she went.

"Thank you" I said to Miss Mason

"You won't be saying that in a minute"

When we got to her office she put the kettle on and made us both a cup of tea.

"Ivy I need you to try with the PRU"

"I'm not sitting in a room with that sadistic cow!"

"Ivy!...I need you to help me help you"

"Now i'm just confused"

"Okay. I can't keep defending you if you act like this"

I laughed.

"I never asked you to defend me"

"Ivy come on we're not going over this again..."

Her sentence was interrupted by a short tap on the door but she didn't flinch like I did. Like she was expecting it. Then as the door opened the pieces fitted together.

"Why did you call my mum?" I questioned only to realise what i'd said "I mean Lara"

"Because I need you to talk to me Ivy..."

I stood up.

"What is wrong with you people? I. Don't. Need. To. Talk."

I left the office needing some time alone. I knew better than to go to the toilet they always looked there so instead I searched for an empty classroom...storage cupboard...anywhere. I eventually settled for Miss Campbell's office. I settled down on the couch, finally alone with my thoughts.

They all wanted me to talk but they didn't understand that I couldn't! I saw it everytime. That look. Pity. Then they patronised you, then the hugging started like I was too weak to take it. I'd lived through it they hadn't! I was so deep in thought I never heard the door.

(Rachel's POV)

What I needed right now was a hammer and chisel because I'd hit a brick wall. If I could just find someway to get through to her. I'd been trying for months now and gotten nowhere. Kim brought her back after long.

"Ivy has something to say" Kim said and all eyes drifted to Ivy

"Look I'm sorry I stormed off...again. I just need you all to stop pushing. I have my reasons for not wanting to talk. Maybe someday I'll be ready but that has to be in my own time"

We had no choice but to accept Ivy's decision. Pushing her would get us nowhere. Maybe it would just make things worse.


	17. Chapter 17

(Ivy's POV)

I laid curled up with Luke on his bed as he held me to his chest. I didn't know what this was, we hadn't said we were together but we were more than friends. I knew that much. Luke was being a bit off with me, quiet...

"What's wrong?" I asked

"Nothing" He replied dismissively

"Tell me?"

"Alright. I liked you for you. I hate you being involved in this stupid gang stuff"

"They're my friends Luke"

"And I'm your boyfriend but I never get to see you cause you're always with them"

"That's not true..."

"Isn't it?...What about when we were supposed to go for pizza but you dumped me for Lindsay!"

"You said it was okay!"

"Yeah I lied alright!?"

"Why are you yelling at me!?" I yelled back

"Because I don't like the person you're turning into...Into one of them. Lara, Miss Campbell, Miss Mason. You've got them all running around after you but all you do is act like a kid and throw it back in their face. You're like a spoilt brat!"

"A spoilt brat!? Really!?"

"Yeah and I don't want to go out with you. Not until you sort yourself out..."

"What so you're dumping me?"

"No we're taking a break until you find the old Ivy..."

"Why do you care about Mason? And Campbell?"

"Because they've been good to me and they're being good to you and you're being a cow!"

"All right you win, I'll try just don't break things off..."

"I don't believe you Ivy. Prove it. But until then we're done"

I quickly retreated to my room where I grabbed my leather jacket and ran down the stairs, trying to fight the tears and hurt that threatened to override my body.

"Where are you going?" Miss Campbell asked

"I need to go somewhere I'll be back soon"

"Uh Ivy!" Miss Campbell called

I didn't know where to go. Did I go to Lara? Or did I go to Miss Mason? I didn't know. I didn't know if either of them would care...Luke was right. Although I hated to admit it, he was right. I felt sick, like I couldn't breathe. Where did I go? Where?

(Rachel's POV)

I was round at the school house, I'd missed my morning meeting with Chris and Kim and we had some things to discuss including the new PRU. I arrived at the house to find Luke sat outside on the steps.

"Luke? Everything alright?" I asked

He looked a little down and unhappy.

"Yeah I'm fine Miss. Y'know, girl trouble" he replied

"Ivy trouble?"

He nodded softly.

"Listen Miss thanks for trying to help her. I know it's been hard but thanks..."

"No need to thank me...I'm here to help. Ivy will come round she's just going through a lot. She needs all of us to support her"

"Not me..." He said glumly

I looked at him my eyes full of curiousity waiting for an expansion on that last comment.

"We broke up" He explained

"Oh, what happened?" I asked

By this point I had taken a seat next to him on the stone steps at the entrance to the school house as I realised this wasn't going to be a two minute conversation.

"I told her that I didn't like her being involved in all this gang stuff, and I told her to try harder with Lara, you and Miss Campbell and that you were only trying to help. But we got into a bit argument and she took off...I don't know where she's gone but she's been gone ages"

"Well thanks for sticking up for us and trying to help but I've dealt with worse than Ivy...She's just hurt and angry and she feels like she can't trust anyone. She's keeping a lot bottled up and she can't control it. I think once she confides in someone she'll feel a lot better but until then we just have to be there for her..."

"I know, I just get mad because I wanna help her but she won't let me"

(Ivy's POV)

I sat on some random park bench my hood pulled up and my knees close to my chest. The bottle of vodka in my hand was three quaters empty and I was pretty smashed. I complained about how much I hated her but I was so much like her. My mum. I drunk to get away and I hurt everyone that tried to help me. That was great! Not. The truth was I had secrets, bad secrets. It was bad enough keeping them, but I didn't know if I could handle sharing them. I wasn't strong enough for that...


	18. Chapter 18

(Rachel's POV)

Ivy did eventually come back but it was gone 10 when she did, I sent her straight to bed because she was in no state for a lecture. I didn't know it was possible for a teenager to get THAT drunk. Chris had to carry her upstairs to bed.

The next day hit us with a bombshell that none of us could have ever predicted. Ivy turned up to school on time in the correct uniform. It shocked my a little, especially as I hadn't spoken to her about the night before, but somehow she seemed sorry already...

(Ivy's POV)

I didn't want another argument and maybe some of what Luke had said had sunk in. I liked him. Like really liked him and I wanted to prove to him that I was worth it. I went to the PRU and took my assigned seat next to Lindsay and Josh. We had an english assignment to work on this morning and I had quite a bit to do because my behaviour yesterday meant I wasn't in class so hadn't started it. I took out my pen and started writing, keeping my head down and getting on with my work.

I made it through to break easily much to mine and Miss Boston's surprise. When the bell rung the whole class headed for the door like a stampead.

"Ivy? Can you wait a minute?" Miss Boston asked

I didn't say anything but stayed stood behind my seat. When the room was empty, she came over.

"I like the good behaviour today, it's much better than yesterday. Keep it up" she smiled

I gave her a small smile.

There was a quick tap on the door and it opened.

"Ah Rachel, I just saying how please I am with Ivy's behaviour this morning. It's been like seeing a different side to her" Miss Boston told her

"That's really good news. Could I borrow Ivy?" Miss Mason replied

"Of course it's break, she's all yours"

"Ivy could you come with me please?"

"Sure" I replied

Why was she acting all weird and formal. She had a grim look on her face.

(Rachel's POV)

I took her to my office where the two police officers were waiting.

"Have I done something wrong?" She asked

"No sweetheart, take a seat over there"

She sat down in the corner, her hands on her legs as she fidgeted. I placed my hand on both of hers.

"Ivy...This morning we found your brother's body"

"Body?" She asked stunned

Body as in he was dead?

"How?" She asked

"I don't think that's a good idea..." The policeman answered

"I said how did he die?" She asked again

I squeezed her hand gently.

"He was found him at 74 highfield road he had bruising and multiple stab wounds..."

"74 highfield road but that's..."

"We've charged Victoria Greene with murder"

"You've got it wrong. He doesn't even live there...He was taken so she couldn't hurt him"

The man placed a photo on the table, it was quite graphic and I was surprised they showed it her. It was a photo of the crimescene. There were little yellow numbered cards and her brother laid on the floor, he was covered in blood and his little face was so pale. He couldn't have been more than 10 years old which led me to wonder why she'd never mentioned him before...

All the colour drained from Ivy's face and in seconds she looked like a ghost, she stood.

"Well thanks for telling me, I appreciate it" she said

(Ivy's POV)

I didn't know how I felt. Maybe it just hadn't sunk in yet I don't know. He just couldn't be gone. He couldn't. I could breathe, all I could see was that photo...him just laying there.

"Ivy wait!" Miss Mason called

I stopped and turned, I just I could catch my breathe. I started making a sound that was like crying but my sobs were trapped and with each choked breathe a sound came out. Miss Mason held me but the sound continued. She rubbed my back and ran her hand down my hair.

"It's okay...It's going to be okay"


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N: WARNING! This chapter is about Ivy's childhood, it contains descriptions of abuse which some might not like. If you don't want to read it then don't...Simples.**_

(Rachel's POV)

Ivy was distraught which wasn't surprising in normal circumstances. Let alone Ivy's, her sobs were like chokes of pain she couldn't catch her breathe and as I held her I could feel her heart hammering against the front of her ribcage. It was like she'd been crushed her whole world had come tumbling down.

"Sssshhhh come on darling" I soothed as I took her back into my office still holding her, If I let go I was sure she'd collapse.

I sat her down on the soft green chairs in the corner and gave her a glass of water, but she was shaking so much that most of it ended up on the floor. She sipped the water slowly.

"Come on sweetie it's alright" I crouched in front of her holding her hand.

I'd know Ivy since she started at Waterloo Road and that was nearly a year now. But she'd never trusted me. But even as distraught as she was something changed in her eyes and she trusted me. It took quite a while but I eventually got her calmed down. I moved next to her and put my arm around her and she melted into my side.

"What was his name?" I asked

"Ryan..." She answered but I could tell she wasn't finished. "...It started when I was 8 Ryan was only 2, I always tried to defend him. Mum had left us alone again. I always tried to make everything perfect. There was never much food in but I scraped pennies together to get something so Ryan wouldn't go hungry...I scrubbed the house but it was never good enough"

Her whole body had gone rigid and her face pale and blank.

"Ryan was in bed when she came in with some guy, he was probably from the pub. She sent him up stairs and took a glass off the side, she threw it but I turned and it smashed on my back. She hit me and told me it would get worse if I didn't do as she asked. She told me to go upstairs..." Sobs overwhelmed her again but she continued "...She said her friend wanted to play a game with me. I didn't want to cause trouble so I went. It wasn't a game, it didn't feel right and it hurt but he was too big for me to push away. When he'd finished, I laid there numb. Mum smiled and said I was a good girl and he handed her a roll of 20's. Once he'd gone I started crying, I said I didn't like it but she was angry she beat me and then said it was her house, if I didn't live by her rules then she'd hurt Ryan..."

I held her so tight. I couldn't believe it, she'd been 8 years old.

"It started as nothing, it was just the odd slap, a kick, a punch when she was drunk. But by the time I was 9 it got worse broken ribs, punctured lung bruises, cuts, internal bleeding. I was a very "accident prone" child. I sent Ryan away, left him outside the social services office...I just wanted him to be safe. Victoria went mad, I couldn't move for days. I just laid at the bottom of the stairs she'd pushed me down. She didn't care it was like I was invisible she just carried on..."

I closed my eyes for a second before reopening them, how could a mother do that to her own child?


	20. Chapter 20

(Ivy's POV)

I felt better and worse. Better because everything was out in the open but worse because my brother was gone. Lara and Miss Mason had decided it was a good idea for me to stay with Lara tonight, but I couldn't sleep. I had a funeral to arrange and there was a possibility of me being called as a witness at Victoria's trial. I sat by the pool moving my feet around in the water, just thinking. My phone rung and the screen flashed up.

_**Luke calling...**_

I pressed reject, I wasn't in the mood for another argument. Before turning my phone off. I pulled out my purse and found the only picture I had of me and Ryan together and out fell a razor blade. The one I kept in case of emergencies. It laid on the floor, staring at me...it took several minutes for temptation and pain to win the argument in my head and I picked up the razor. I pressed the sharp edge to my pale, scarred skin on my inner arm and dragged it from my wrist to my elbow. It felt so good and just helped me regain a bit of control as well as making me numb from the pain I didn't want to feel.

The thick red liquid landed on the floor in drops rapidly as I cut again and again deeper and deeper until there was no space left. I started to feel a bit lightheaded and laid down beside the pool and drifted off into the darkness where reality was the dream.

(Lara's POV)

I woke up in the early hours of the morning about 3ish needing the toilet. I went in to the bathroom and did what I needed to do. Then on my way back I checked on Ivy, to find the guest room empty. I went downstairs and found her laid asleep next to the pool, I went over to pull her away from the edge because if she rolled over she'd drown. But as I got closer I saw the red puddle that was dripping into the pool turning the water red. I noticed the small silver blade on the ground beside her.

"Oh Ivy!" I said rushing over and pressing on her arm with my hand

I shook her gently. "Ivy! Ivy wake up!"

"I...wasn't trying...to...off...myself. I just...needed...the pain...to go"

"I know darling come on" I said, forcing her to sit up.

I pulled her to her feet and supported her, she walked by my side drowsily.

"Hey! Stay awake! I'll get you to hospital"

"No! They'll lock me up"

"Ivy darling, that needs a doctor"

"You're a doctor..."

"I'm a psychiatrist"

"Just patch me up or leave it either way I'm not going to hospital"

I had no choice I cleaned it up and bandaged it.

(Ivy's POV)

The next day I felt like I was back to my old ways, hiding my arms under my sleeves. My hair was pulled back into a ponytail and I had no make-up because I just cried it off. My eyes were red and puffy. As I walked down the corridor I could feel everyone's eyes on me, hear them whispering. I made it to the PRU and sat on the computer maybe checking my email would help distract me.

_**LOCAL WOMAN ACCUSED OF MURDER GRANTED BAIL**_

As I loaded yahoo the story hit me in the face. I left the computer. As I walked out into the corridor most people had a newspaper, that was why they'd been staring. I grabbed one of the papers that had been left on the window still. The headline on there similar.

_**WOMAN WHO KILLED SON BAILED**_

All the hurt all the anger everything turned into a burning fire of hatred. She wasn't going to rot in prison because I was going to get there first. I threw the paper down on the floor and left.

(Nikki's POV)

I'd seen Ivy throw something and was about to tell her to pick it up before she vanished. As I got closer I saw the headline, Ivy had seemed pretty angry. I turned to the window and caught sight of Ivy leaving out of the gate. I knocked on Rachel's door not waiting for an answer before I went in. She was in a meeting with Chris and Kim.

"We've got a problem" I put the paper on the table.

"Oh no. Has Ivy seen this?"

"Yeah, she just left school"

"Oh no!" Rachel grabbed her keys "Chris keep things running"

"I'll come with you" I offered "You might need me"


	21. Chapter 21

(Ivy's POV)

I wanted to make her pay. She needed to pay for what she'd done. As I wasn't going to grant her the mercy of making it quick. She deserved to suffer. In pain. Scared. Like Ryan had. After I beat the crap out of her a bit I took a large kitchen knife and held it to her throat as I pinned her against the kitchen wall. The door opened and Miss Mason and Miss Boston came charging in.

"Ivy stop" Miss Mason said

"Why should I? She killed Ryan why is she allowed to walk free?"

"She shouldn't" Miss Boston replied

I turned back to Victoria "You took everything from me. My childhood. My confidence. My trust. Everything. Even Ryan. And you know why? Because you're a poisonous bitch! Well guess what? I'm going to make sure that you rot in hell!"

"Go on. Do it."

My hand was shaking with the knife still in it.

"Ivy she's not worth your life, you can walk away and have a great life and she'll rot in jail"

My hand shook worse and I dropped the knife, Miss Boston kicked it away and called the police. I punched her.

"That's from me"

Then I hit her again twice as hard.

"That's for Ryan"

The problem was I couldn't stop on just two hits, she deserved to pay, for what she did to me...For what she did to Ryan. She didn't seem fazed by any of it. I stopped and took a step back.

"You should have seen his face when I stabbed him, he screamed and cried, then the life faded from his eyes as the blood drained from his body..." Victoria said

She wasn't even sorry. There was no remorse in her eyes in fact she seemed proud of what she'd done.

"That's enough!" Miss Mason said snappily

"I'll kill you" I said bitterly

(Rachel's POV)

Nikki and I took Ivy back to the school house. Ivy was laid on the sofa in the living room just staring into space, she was strong one of the strongest kids I'd ever met but I didn't know if she could take anymore. As my gaze moved I noticed red drops forming on the floor, I followed it up her hand to where it disappeared under her jumper. I took her arm and lifted up her jumper sleeve. There was a blood soaked bandage covering the inside of her arm, as I unwrapped the white material I saw the deep lines of red. Ivy looked at me blankly as if her energy and her fight was gone.

"Oh darling..."

It had taken so much effort for Ivy to stop cutting and now she'd just...given up. I went into the kitchen to search for the first aid kit. Nikki followed.

"Did she do that to herself?" She whispered

I nodded gently. "She did it when I first met her, it took everything to get her to stop"

"...and this has kicked it off again?"

"Looks like it. I just hope it doesn't get worse like last time"

"What happened last time?"

"There were a few suicide attempts. Keep an eye on her I don't want us missing anything..."

I looked back to Ivy, who was getting worse. I sighed, she wasn't going to like it.

"In fact call an ambulance, then ring Kim and let her know what's happening"

I went back in and crouched in front of the drowsy girl. I placed my hand on her cheek stroking it softly.

"Listen sweetheart, an ambulance is on it's way okay. Your arm isn't getting any better" I told her

"No please..."

"Listen, I'm not going anywhere. Everything is going to be okay. I promise"

I took a towel and pressed it to her arm as I held it in the air.

(Ivy's POV)

When the ambulance came and two very familiar paramedics came in. I always seemed to get Comfort and Luke. Miss Mason was still holding my arm in the air probably keeping me alive.

"Hi Ivy" Comfort said

"What trouble have you gotten yourself into this time?" Luke smiled

Comfort put a mask on my face, while Luke got to work trying to stop the bleeding.

"BP's low, let's get a line in...Small scratch" Comfort said

Then she stuck the cannula into the back of my hand. As I started to drift off again Comfort hooked up the fluids.

"Ivy darlin' stay with me"

"I don't want to go to hospital" I mumbled

"No can do I'm afraid" Luke said

Miss Mason took my other hand and squeezed it tightly.

"It's going to be okay I promise" she smiled

Miss Mason came with me in the ambulance.

"I don't want to see Sam..."

_**A/N: Sorry if this was a bit of a crappy chapter, I've been a bit busy. Anyway let me know what you thought. Reviews are always welcome! :) **_


	22. Chapter 22

(Ivy's POV)

I laid on a resus trolley, everything was distorted.

"Ivy can you hear me?" Sam asked

"I said I didn't want to see you. Go away"

"No can do I'm afraid. You see you've probably done quite a bit of damage to your arm and god knows what you used but it's infected and your body is going into septic shock so right now you need me"

"You think you're great just because you have a couple of letters in front of your name. Well I don't believe a word you say..." I started to drift off again

"Ivy? Stay with me! Can we get another line in? Set up for an RSI! Page theatre. Get on to ITU as well"

(Lara's POV)

I sat in the relatives room with Rachel guessing and guessing...Thinking the worst. I was the person that told the bad news not the one that received it. Before I became a psychiatrist, I was a registrar and a fully qualified surgeon. I became a psychiatrist because it was better pay, better hours and a new challenge.

I'd never had any children of my own, I was a workoholic I never really had time for relationships. That was until I met Patrick Spiller. We'd been working together the last few months. I liked him and he liked me but I had complications and he understood that. Ivy needed me more, I didn't know what I'd do if I lost her...

Sam came in and sat down.

"Ivy's gone up to theatre and then she'll be moved to ITU" she explained

"Hold on why the hell are you treating her?" I asked

"I didn't have a choice every other doctor was busy"

I wasn't happy but what choice did I have.

"What's happening?"

"She's gone into septic shock but it looks like we caught it just in time"

(Ivy's POV)

**- 2 weeks later -**

_**"Ryan! Wait!" I called as he ran off in front of me**_

_**"Come on Ivy!" He yelled back**_

_**We were in a golden field I think it was corn or something. As I ran I felt free, I caught up with Ryan. His short brown spikey hair perfect and those bright blue eyes...But as I watched his face changed to a look of horror and everything went dark like clouds covered us, thundery clouds. Then she was there, Victoria and there was so much blood. I just couldn't stop her.**_

"RYAN!" I woke up screaming, then lay there breathing heavily

I pulled myself up in bed but the wires didn't give me much leway. Where was everyone? Couldn't they bear to stick around for a few hours while I went to theatre I had a needle in my hand with what I asumed was blood it was taped down my arm with something red travelling through it...There was another needle in the crease of my elbow, I didn't have a clue what that was for.

I was going to press the buzzer but it felt stupid I mean I'd only had minor surgery. I pulled the tube from my nose, then took the needles out. I was surprised at how good my arm felt and how fast it seemed to be healing fast too.

(Lara's POV)

I been for a coffee and to call Rachel with an update on Ivy's condition. Jac, Ivy's consultant caught me on my way back to Ivy.

"Is something wrong?"

"She's awake but I'm going to ask our hospital psychiatrist, Dr Kozinsky to come down and make an assesment but with your agreement I'd like to advise that Ivy be admitted to the psychiatric ward"

"I don't know if that's a good idea...shutting her away"

"Let's see what Dr Kozinsky says shall we?"

"Can I see her first?"

"I don't think it's a good idea. Let's wait until afterwards..."

Once again I was left waiting in the corridor with that horrible anxious feeling. As much as I didn't want Ivy to go into hospital I couldn't help but feel it was for the best. Dr Kozinsky was in there for about an hour but it seemed so much longer, she came over to me.

"Dr Stone" she greeted "I'm happy that this little outburst is a one off as the result of the grief she's suffering for the loss of her brother...However, If I'm called down to assess her mental state again it might not have the same outcome. We'll sort out some outpatients appointments for her to come and see me"

"I understand. Thank you"

She left me yet I continued to watch her from outside the room.

"What's the verdict?" Rachel asked

"They're not admitting her...this time" I replied "I don't know what to do Rachel. When it's other people I know but with her...I just feel like I'm losing her and I can't stop it"

"You can't...but we can. We'll get her through this"

"I can't go in yet. I just need to pull myself together first" I explained


	23. Chapter 23

-A. Week later-

(Ivy's POV)

Lara had been off with me and I knew I'd hurt her although she'd never admit it. I'd missed Ryan's funeral and Luke had just dumped me...Again. For real this time. He said I needed to focus on myself before we could have anything. Everything was falling apart and I was really struggling to keep everything together. It was my first day back at Waterloo Road since my...um..."Accident". I could see it already the whispers, the sniggering...

I sat on my bed staring at my reflection in the mirror. My face was pale and placid, and I'd lost so much weight that the bones were actually starting to poke out and look unhealthy. I covered my face in foundation trying to give it some normal colour and hide the blackened bags that framed my eyes, I added mascara to try and draw more attention to my eyes hoping they wouldn't notice the rest of me.

My horrible, boney legs stuck out from under my skirt and my jumper was baggy. I picked up my bag slinging it over my shoulder. My hair hung down my back in a long french plait. As I walked into the diningroom everyone turned to look at me and the room fell silent. I turned and fled instantly running from the school house, I shoved my hands in the pockets of my blazer and rushed to school struggling to see the pavement from the tears that spilled ferociously down my face.

"What a nutter" Amy sniggered as I headed up the stairs

I wiped the tears away fast but it was nothing compared to the speed of the new ones that formed. I went to my locker and pressed my forehead to the cold metal sobbing harder. I just felt defeated and horrible.

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why me? Why Ryan? Why all of this? That was all I could ask myself again and again.

"Ivy?". A familiar voice asked and I turned to see Lindsay stood there alone.

I shook my head softly in reply.

"Come on?" She said "Let's get you sorted" she put her arm around me and led me up the stairs to the girls toilets.

I sat leaning on the edge of one of the sinks as Lindsay dried my eyes and used make-up wipes to get rid of the black lines from my mascara. She reapplied my foundation and added a little pale pink blush to give me some colour. She brushed on my usual thick black mascara only this time it was waterproof.

"There we go. Much better" she smiled

"Thank you" I gave her a small thanking smile

(Rachel's POV)

I'd arrived at school early that morning, I had a lot to do with the trips that were coming up, the interschool sports days and the PRU all of those came with their fair share of paperwork. The ringing phone sound filled my office and it took me a while to realise it was my mobile.

"Hello?" I answered

I hadn't got a chance to check the caller I'd before I answered. It was about 8:15am and I wasn't quite on the ball yet.

"Hi Rachel, It's Kim. I was just wondering if you'd seen Ivy this morning?" She asked

"No, why is there a problem?"

"She was a bit upset this morning, she looked a bit drained. I didn't get chance to talk to her before she took off..."

"She has a mentoring session with me today, hold on a second..." I flicked through my papers until I found my timetable "Yeah, just after breaktime. I'll see what I can get out of her okay?"

"Alright. Keep me posted"

"Will do" I replied

"Thanks Rachel"

"Alright bye"

I headed out into the corridor just before the bell rung. I spotted Lindsay with another girl that I didn't recognise at first...she was stick thin with dark hair pulled back. It was only when she turned that I realised it was Ivy. I hadn't realised how much weight she'd lost until now. Her eyes met mine and she led Lindsay the other way as if she was avoiding me.

(Lindsay's POV)

"Do me a favour?" Ivy asked

I looked at her waiting for her to continue.

"There's something I have to do. Cover for me?"

"Where are you going?" I asked

"I need to see Ryan, I have to be able to put the past behind me. Just say I went to the dentist or something? Please?" She pleaded

"Okay, alright"

She hugged me briefly before taking off down the stairs.

I went into the PRU and took my seat, Miss Boston started taking the register.

"Ivy Greene?" She asked

"Umm Miss she had a dentist appointment...Miss Mason knows about it" I added to try and make it sound more convincing

We were interrupted by a knock on the door and Miss Mason poked her head in.

"Can I have a quick word with Ivy please?"

I spun round quickly and gave her a pleading look.

"Um Miss she told you she had a dentist appointment" I said silently praying

"Oh right. In that case can I borrow Lindsay?" She asked

"Go ahead"

I stood and went outside with Miss Mason.

"Where's Ivy?" She asked when the door was safely shut behind us

"Dentist. She forgot to tell you..."

"Come on Lindsay...I'm trying to help"

"But I promised"

"She's not thinking straight I'm supposed to be keeping an eye on her. If anything happens it's my fault..." She tried to guilt me into it

"Look I don't know alright? She just said she was going to see Ryan because she had to sort some things out..."

_**A/N: Reviews welcome :) As always. Sorry about the delays in chapters had a pretty big block still kinda do but anyways let me know what you thought...**_


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